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I realized recently that caring for someone else gets me focused on that person and stops me from thinking about my own pain. If the person I am caring for is comfortable and as joyful as possible in the situation, I bask in that positive state. Is it the distraction? Is it the brain vibes? Is it the smile on that face? The sparkle in the eye? The sound of a shared laugh? Even with all of the routine and sometimes unpleasant stuff involved in caregiving, I try to keep my eye on the ‘prize’ of the positive distraction from my own woes. How about you?
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A couple of months ago I had the honor of being the bedside advocate for a friend with MS. While she was in the hospital for 4 weeks I joined family members and other friends in rotating shifts to make sure that she had her communication tools available because she had long since lost the ability to vocalize. She used eye movements to look at signs we posted around the room that had common phrases on them; Need Bedpan, Pain, Hot, Cold, Raise knees, Thank you, Tell me something good and (just for fun) Margarita on the rocks no salt.
My friend passed away 4 weeks ago and I am at peace knowing that she is at peace. She did ask me to share the signs tool with other caregivers and said that people like me who have pain can’t always verbalize. Especially when the pain spikes so overwhelmingly. So having similar signs posted might make a situation less stressful for everyone present even in a home caregiving situation.
Also, add markers, tape and paper to your hospital ready bag or ‘go bag’ so that you are able to make signs as needed.
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FredFriend,
Our deepest sympathy for the loss of your friend. I love the sign tool idea. I cared for my in-laws for many years. My mother-in-law had diabetes. We came up with a word that she could say when she was having issues with low blood sugar. She didn’t have to worry about trying to explain what was happening, all she had to do was say “blood”. We instantly knew what we needed to do to help her and it was easy for my father-in-law to remember.
TPC_YaYa
TPC Community Moderator
“The views or opinion(s) contained herein do not necessarily represent those of The Pain Community.” -
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