First let me say that it is hard to be a caregiver. Please be sure and take care of yourself.
It sounds like this is a fairly new diagnosis and with that comes so much change for both of you.
He may feel that if the medications are not easing his pain enough then how could massage or physical therapy help. Frustration can be over the top for both of you. He can feel the frustration from feeling as if he isn’t the same person he was before the pain. You may feel frustration because you cannot take the pain or ease the pain for him.
This frustration can get in the way of conversations happening between the two of you.
I can only speak and share from my own experience, my husband was beyond frustrated and angry because he was suppose to protect me and he was helpless to stop the pain. I being the one in pain was frustrated because I didn’t understand his frustration, I failed to see how it was all affecting him.
It helped both of us when he began going to my appointments with me. It helped him to hear what the doctor was saying to me and it allowed him the chance to ask questions and share his concerns. It helped to open up our communication at home too.
I wish you both the best.