PAIN… HOW DO YOU SURVIVE IT AND WHERE DOES IT TAKE YOU?
This is a subject that I’ve wanted to address for a long time. It’s hard and there are no words to do the topic justice. This can also be an AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION THEME. Feel free to join in and answer the question…
The docs always ask us to rate our pain on a scale of 1<10. What does that really mean? We’ve all heard some-one reply “my pain is a 12 or some other higher number”. While I wouldn’t presume to question their level of pain. Every-one has a different tolerance to pain, saying anything higher tan 10 voids the answer. All it says is you don’t have the tools to rate your pain. One trick I learned along the way was to write down what the numbers meant to me. What really is the difference between a level 3 and a level 4 pain? A personal scale that stays constant. It’s something that can be given to your doc so thy understand as well. Most days my pain level is at 5 and a half. I know that because a slight increase takes it to a level 6 and that takes my breath away. At a level 10 I am passing out. After that point you’re unconscious and there is no pain. It can’t get any worse than that.
As weird as it seems I was laying in my cockpit the other night hovering between the hallucinations of a level 9 pain and the relief of a level 10. Relief? Did I really just use that word? Yes I did. That level no longer scares me. I’ve become familiar with it and know I will get through it. In the process my mind takes me to some pretty bizarre places. So as I was lying there between reality and hallucination I started to work on this piece. That meant trying to pay attention to what was happening and where I was going. In the coming days I’ll try really hard to share some of these journeys with you. Over time I hope to share how I came to be in this strange place of trying to embrace my pain enough to share.
Until then have a gentle day and take care of each other.
bd
