Gigi,
I am so happy you wrote on the forum and shared snip-its of the struggles you are experiencing with your pain journey. There are others like you who will help both here and in the chat room. We meet every M, W, F from 11am-12noon ET. Please join us and we can share real-time—help answer any questions you may have AND listen to your frustrations.
Some questions I immediately thought of are: Have you ventured out from just conservative treatment? Are you working with a pain specialist who embraces integrative care such as massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, mindfulness meditation and much, much more?
Another suggestion is: Have you reviewed the wellness section of our website (see Education tab)? There may be some tips you have not considered yet. Just know, all is not lost. We are here to support you the best way we can.